Monty Harper

Lyrics

Sailing in a garbage pail a little boy and girl
approached a mighty clipper ship with pirate flags unfurled.
Its wake upset their vessel and they tried their best to swim.
The crewmen on the clipper threw a net and hauled 'em in.

"What a funny pair of fish we've caught," they cried in mock surprise.
"Shall we boil or bake or barbecue, or mince them into pies?"
But a raven's rackety cackle made the crewmen quit their game
And as their captain climbed the hatchway both the children breathed his name.

Tropeo the Pirate, Terror of the Seas
A turtle bit his legs off; he walks upon his knees.
The raven on his shoulder speaks of dark and evil things.
The sailors tell tall tales about how swift his saber swings.

"We want to join the pirates!" piped the little girl and boy.
We ran away from Mommy and our box of boring toys.
We're tired of brushing teeth and combing hair and making beds.
We'd rather plunder treasure with bandanas 'round our heads!"

The crewmen roared with laughter as they rolled about the decks.
"What's a mommy, what's a bed, and who's to save your scrawny necks?
We'll feed you to the seagulls if you cry or whine or pout!"
Said Tropeo, "To the brig they go, and turn this boat about."

Tropeo the Pirate, Terror of the Seas
A turtle bit his legs off; he walks upon his knees.
The raven on his shoulder speaks of dark and evil things.
The sailors tell tall tales about how swift his saber swings.

"By thunder," rumbled Tropeo. "Those brats'll pay their way.
I'll see they dive for pearls amid the sharks in Oyster Bay."
Yet as he spoke the tykes were finding comfort in the hold:
dry clothes, a bowl of chowder and a blanket for the cold.

That very night a stunted figure stole the children from their beds,
And careful not to wake them, tied bandanas 'round their heads.
He put them in a lifeboat which he lowered to the foam.
He bade the bird upon his shoulder, "Guide these pirates safely home."

Then he grabbed the bird and whispered, "'tis a secret, what we do,
and if e'er you breathe a word of it, I'll dine on raven stew!"

Tropeo the Pirate, Terror of the Seas
A turtle bit his legs off; he walks upon his knees.
The raven on his shoulder speaks of dark and evil things.
The sailors tell tall tales about how swift his saber swings.